So, you or a “friend” of yours has been banned. Didn’t you spend three months ranking up that account? That sucks, man. What can you do about it? Did you even do anything wrong? Let’s find out.
Maybe your friend logged into his account from your computer, or your brother or sister also has an account and you did something that was against the rules. Did you read the terms and conditions when you signed up? You didn’t? Damn. What about the Family Accounts page, that lists things that family accounts are not allowed to do? You didn’t read that either? DAMN. Get your lawyer on the phone ASAP! No lawyer?
Okay, fine, fine, I’ll have to represent you in court. But let me get this straight… two accounts got banned, one was yours and the other was your cats?! That seems a bit strange, I’m not sure it would stand up in court. Do you have a picture of your cat playing Bootleggers? It will not really help the case, but I’d sure love to see it! Okay, so we do have a picture the cat at least. That’s good.
Fighting a ban is something that takes time and determination. Sure, there is an appeal system, but you don’t want to go wasting time with that. Go straight to the Game Forum and make a thread talking about how unfairly you have been treated. The majority of Bootleggers players will be supportive, giving out first rate advice such as “cool story bro”. It might not be allowed to talk about bans in the Game Forum, but you don’t know that, do you? You’ll DEFINITELY get players on your side. Then once you have rallied the troops, make your appeal.
Make sure to quote some facts, like the FACT that you and your cat are definitely different people. Well… different species for a start. So if anything you have an even stronger case! Point out that it was the cats fault, she made a mistake and now she is sorry, but it definitely isn’t your fault. Don’t show remorse, admins are not human; they will see it as weakness and crush you with the ban hammer again!
So what if they have matching IP addresses on accounts that are interacting with each other. So what if they have some matching cookies. Actually, cookies! That raises an important point. Every time you login to Bootleggers you send a cookie to BSF. Just buy different cookies for you and your cat. That way he cannot use them against you. I recommend Oreos and maybe some plain chocolate chip; they cannot be mistaken for the same thing. I may not be tech savvy, but I can say without any doubt at all that Oreos are not chocolate chip cookies. It’s fool proof!
In conclusion, the most important thing to remember is that the internet is a free country, you’re allowed to go wherever you like without being questioned. It’s not as if BSF owns the Bootleggers domain and server, he cannot simply refuse to allow you to access it for whatever reason.Oh, wait… He can? Well damn! That changes everything. The best thing you can do is to take a marker pen, preferably black, pull down your pants and write “U BANNED ME!” on your ass. Take a picture and email it to BSF. It might not get you unbanned, but you might scar him for life. Revenge is a dish best served with a "cheeky" smile.
Finally, if you have taken seriously anything that I’ve said:
sat•ire
noun
1. the use of irony, sarcasm, ridicule, or the like, in exposing, denouncing, or deriding vice, folly, etc.
2. a literary composition, in verse or prose, in which human folly and vice are held up to scorn, derision, or ridicule.
