I. The inventor of throat lozenges has died...
There'll be no coffin' at his funeral.
II. What is the biggest lie ever?
"Yes, I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service."
III. "Gary Glitter looking at sixteen years."
There's a first!
IV. One of my mates told me that I often make people uncomfortable by invading their personal space...
...Which was an incredibly unnecessary and hurtful thing to say -- it ruined our bath!
V. Optimist: The glass is half full.
Pessimist: The glass is half empty.
Feminist: The glass is being raped.
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Stay funny!
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